I get this dreaded question on a weekly basis from my followers. I know the fear it can strike in the hearts of mothers when their toddler suddenly stops napping. It causes us to go into catastrophe mode and worry that they will never ever nap again! But, I’m here to bring some calm, reason, and helpful tips to you. Most likely your toddler is NOT done napping- seriously. So don’t freak out, and let’s talk through some basics like: when you can expect your toddler to stop napping for good, what causes nap refusals, how to get your toddler back to napping, and (worse case scenario) what to do if the nap is gone for good.

 

What age do children stop napping?

Every child is different, of course- but I typically find that a majority of children will stop napping between 3-5 years of age. This is a wide range but here’s where you get to use your experience as your child’s parent to help you fine tune this range. If your child has typically had low sleep needs, then it’s likely they will drop their nap on the early side of this range- around 3 years. If your child has typically had high sleep needs, then you can expect them to drop their nap closer to 5 years. If your child has seemed pretty average and follows typical wake windows and sleep schedules, then they will probably fall smack dab in the center around 4 years.

 

Now, what do I mean by low and high sleep needs? If your child has lower sleep needs, then they get less sleep in a 24 hour period than their peers. However, and this is a BIG point, they still seem well-rested and they are getting plenty of sleep for their body. This is such a big point because I often talk to families who think they have a low sleep needs child but the child is clearly not getting enough sleep. They are tired, cranky, wake up in a bad mood constantly, and simply don’t know how to get the sleep their body needs. 

 

These are usually families who have not worked on healthy sleep habits and therefore their child is constantly fighting sleep not because they don’t need it, but because they’ve been conditioned to fight sleep over the months and years. Keep this in mind as you try to assess whether your child is really done napping or not.

 

What causes nap refusal?

Nap resistance and refusal can come about for all kinds of different reasons. 

• Sometimes it’s directly related to the arrival (or impending arrival) of a new sibling. This can be a big change for your toddler and is likely to throw off sleep for a time as they adjust. 
• Sometimes it’s connected to the crib to bed transition. This transition can be a doozy for many families and the challenges it presents can bleed over into nap time. Read more about handling this transition here.
• Sometimes it’s simply par for the course with toddlers. Toddlers are learning to be independent, they are learning that they can “No,” and they are constantly testing boundaries. Resistance at nap time is no exception to this. Check out more about Toddler Sleep and Why It Sucks if this sounds familiar.
• Sometimes a schedule tweak is overdue and by making small changes to the sleep schedule, the resistance will dissipate. At this age, it’s important to anchor the nap at a specific time each day. Right around 1pm is good for most little ones between 2-5 years. If your child tends to sleep in past 7am in the morning, you may need to shift nap time later than 1pm.

 

How do I get my toddler to keep napping?

The biggest piece of advice I want to offer here is CONSISTENCY. Without it, you will continue to have sleep issues. Consistency is so incredibly important for our testing toddlers and preschoolers. 

 

This means that nap time is still offered every single day- regardless of whether your toddler naps or not. Many parents get tripped up by thinking they need to “make” their toddler nap. But that thinking gets us into trouble. You can’t “make” your toddler nap anymore than you can make them like the pink cup or use an inside voice. You cannot control when your toddler falls asleep, how long it takes them to fall asleep, or how long they sleep. What you CAN control are the boundaries you create around sleep time, their sleep environment, the timing of sleep, and the consistency with which you offer all these things.

 

When your child resists their nap, simply continue to offer their nap time each and every day. Give them warnings about impending nap time, do your nap time routine, narrate and validate their big feelings about not wanting to nap, and hold the boundary. They don’t have to sleep during nap time. In fact, I encourage families not to say, “Go to sleep. You need to sleep now.” and instead just tell your little one, “It’s okay if you’re not tired, just rest your body.”

 

Have a set amount of time (I recommend 45 minutes minimum) that you keep your child in their crib or room during nap time and if they aren’t asleep when that time is up, then you can get them up and go on with your day. Don’t focus on the fact that they didn’t nap. Instead say something like, “Good job resting your body. I know it’s hard to do sometimes. Now that nap time is over, let’s play.”

 

By doing these things, you are keeping the framework of nap time in place so that when their brain is done resisting and when their body needs the sleep, they will be able to settle and fall asleep for nap time again!

 

What do I do while I wait for my toddler to start napping again?

This may take a couple days or a couple weeks for your toddler to start napping again. That’s okay. This is a normal part of toddlerhood. Even once they start napping again, you may have days here and there where they stay awake the whole nap time.

 

On the days where your toddler doesn’t nap, you’ll want to offer bedtime earlier than usual. This is to help them “make up” for the lost nap sleep and keep them from becoming overtired. A good general rule of thumb is to allow 12 hours of overnight sleep for a toddler or preschooler who skips their nap. That means if your toddler typically wakes up at 6:30am, you will want to put bedtime at 6:30pm in order to allow their body the chance to get the rest they need.

 

What if the nap is gone forever? 

In some cases, your child will be done napping forever. And I know that can be a really hard pill to swallow. However, just because your child no longer needs a midday nap, that doesn’t mean your child no longer needs a midday rest. I strongly encourage parents to offer a daily quiet time (screen-free) once the nap is gone. This gives the child a chance to rest and practice independent play and it gives parents a time to decompress and rest too. I wrote more extensively here about developing a quiet time.

 

I know this can be an incredibly challenging time in toddlerhood but try to remain calm and patient. Whatever comes, with the right attitude and follow through, you'll get through this! Take this tidbit with you as you go: You can do hard things & so can your child! 

 

Struggling with daycare naps? Is your baby enrolled in daycare and you were just informed that they are moving up to the toddler room and switching to a 1 nap schedule? And you’re thinking, “But they’re only 10 months! They can’t handle 1 nap!” 

 

Well fortunately (and unfortunately), you’re not alone if you’re experiencing this. I see daycare nap struggles often with families and it can be so incredibly frustrating. I wanted to put together this post with 5 tips to help you navigate this annoying (and sometimes sleepless) situation.

 

Daycare nap tip #1: Take a deep breath

I know you may be freaking out right now but the first thing we need to do is breathe. This is a problem for sure, but we aren't going to be able to solve it if we aren't thinking calmly and clearly. This is a challenge but it's not a hopeless situation. So before you move on to implementing tip #2, make sure you have a clear head.

 

Daycare nap tip #2: Communicate & get creative

See if you can set up a meeting or call with your daycare teachers and/or director. Explain your concerns to them about this early transition to 1 nap. Some important points to bring up would be:

• Most babies aren't capable of handling a 1 nap schedule until 14+ months of age
• The transition to 1 nap will require an early bedtime to help your baby recoup the lost sleep and that will make your evening family time shorter than you'd like
• Transitioning to 1 nap too early can lead to over-tiredness and early wakings. This keeps the overtired cycle going

After expressing your concerns about this transition, ask if there is a way you can work together to keep your child on a 2 nap schedule for longer. Try to get creative. If your child is being forced to a 1 nap schedule because of a move to an older room, ask if that move can be held off a few more months. If it can't, can your baby be moved back into the infant room during nap times? Directly ask if there is any way that your child can still be offered a morning nap in some way, shape, or form. Something is better than nothing here.

For more details on communicating baby's sleep needs with your caregivers, check out this blog.

 

Daycare nap tip #3: Let go of what you can't control

After communicating with daycare, you may realize that there is no compromise and there is no way in which they can honor your child's sleep needs. If this is the case, we've reached the "let it go" part. This is important for your mental health. Focus on the things you *can* control when it comes to your baby's sleep and let go of the things you *can't* control. If daycare naps are one of those things outside of your control, then it's time to stop stressing and ruminating on it.

Move on to tip #4 for ways you can try to combat this early nap transition.

 

Daycare nap tip #4: Avoid over-tiredness on your end

Now that your child is moving to 1 nap at daycare, here are my suggestions for handling sleep at home:

• Your baby will be more tired for a while. Try to offer an early bedtime on daycare days. Ideally I'd aim for about 5 hours of awake time between the end of daycare nap and the time you are laying them in the crib at bedtime. For example, if nap ends at 2pm, then aim for bedtime at 7pm. If they seem tired earlier than that, then follow their lead and put them down sooner. Even as early as 6pm may be exactly what they need!
• On the weekends (or any day your child is home with you) continue to offer 2 naps a day like usual. Some parents worry that this will be confusing for baby or throw them off but it's actually essential. Depending on the age of your child, you may continue to offer 2 naps a day on the weekend for months- and that's okay!
• Some night wakings and early wakings will pop up during this time. Do your best to remain consistent in your responses at night. Avoid adding night feeds back in or over-helping. If your child already has the skills to fall asleep on their own, lean on those skills and give them the space to work through those wakings on their own.

 

Daycare nap tip #5: Stay hopeful

If this transition ends up being really rough for your baby and your family, take heart! I know it's hard and frustrating and tiring but it's also just a season. It won't remain like this forever and before you know it, your baby will be older and able to handle 1 nap much better.

Stay hopeful thinking about the future when nap schedules won't feel as make or break. You WILL get there- I promise!

 

Need more help navigating sleep in general? I help tired moms who are overwhelmed by conflicting sleep advice to confidently sleep train. And I do it by providing affordable, personalized, and experienced sleep support. Start here by scheduling a free call.

We've all heard this piece of advice before, "Never wake a sleeping baby!" and as a sleep consultant I've gotten appalled looks when I confess you actually SHOULD wake a sleeping baby sometimes. I thought it'd be helpful to lay out all the reasons and situations where waking a sleeping baby is the right move. Keep reading to find out 4 times you should wake a sleeping baby.

 

Time #1 you should wake a sleeping baby: When you have a newborn sleeping long stretches during the day but not at night

Maybe you have a newborn who is up hourly at night but then daytime comes and they will sleep these big long stretches. Yikes! That's the opposite of what we want!

With newborns, this is usually due to the fact that their circadian rhythm hasn't yet developed (this starts happening around 8-12 weeks) and therefore they really have no clue what's day and what's night. To help them figure this out, our biggest tool is... you guessed it- waking them up during the day!

Daytime naps should be limited to 2 hours during the newborn phase and then baby needs to be woken up, fed, and kept awake for at least a short period of time before you let them fall back asleep. This will be hard work at first but totally worth the extra effort in the end, I promise.

Really struggling with your newborn's sleep? Check out my newborn sleep resources here.

 

Time #2 you should wake a sleeping baby: When your baby is sleeping crappy at night and then making up for it during the day with long, luxurious naps

Similar to #1, but this also applies to babies and toddlers. If they aren't getting good quality night sleep, they may try to make up for it by sleeping A LOT during the day. And if we aren't willing to wake them from naps, it will be really hard to break out of this cycle.

So first order of business is to start capping some those daytime naps so that they can build sleep pressure to sleep more during the night. This will also help you fit in necessary daytime feedings so that nighttime isn't when the bulk of their calories is happening. Download my free nap guide for more details on age-appropriate wake windows and how much daytime sleep is actually necessary.

After you start to shorten their daytime sleep, if you are still struggling with crappy nights, it's time to get to the root issue. Are they sleeping poorly at night because they haven't learned how to regulate their own sleep yet? Is the help you provide to get them to sleep actually hindering their sleep because they can't recreate it?

If you're thinking sleep coaching is the next step, check out my Sleep Coaching Crash Course For Babies- the affordable sleep course for tired moms who just want to stop stressing about sleep!

 

Time #3 you should wake a sleeping baby: When you need to stabilize the schedule

If you have a child who will wake up super late in the morning (8am or later) and then it throws your whole day off, then waking them in the morning to start their day is necessary. 

Not only does have a consistent morning wake up time help you plan your day, it also helps their internal body clock to have that consistency day in and day out.

I always recommend having a 30 minute wake up range that you follow each and everyday. That could mean 6-6:30am or 6:30-7am, or 7:30-8am- you decide what works best for your family and your child. But then following that wake up range means you don't start your child's day before the early time and you wake them up if they are still sleeping at the later time.

If you have a child who is sleeping in late in the morning and it's making naps difficult and pushing bedtime way later than you'd like, then it absolutely makes sense to wake that sleeping baby!

 

Time #4 you should wake a sleeping baby: When you are close to a nap transition but not quite there yet

Over the course of your child's life you'll go through several nap transitions. These can be tricky but the key to making them successful is that you don't want to rush into them. The longer you can hold them off, the smoother they will go.

That's where waking a sleeping baby comes into play. Maybe you have a champion napper (which is great!) but now you're struggling to fit in that 3rd nap and it's really throwing a wrench in the schedule. You know that your child isn't really ready for a 2 nap schedule yet because they can't last 3 hours in between naps but you also can't seem to fit all three naps plus 4 wake windows in AND have bedtime not be ridiculously late.

It's okay to cap some of your baby's naps in order to make this 3 nap schedule work a little longer until they are more ready for the transition. Sit down and do some quick math. Count backward from your ideal bedtime and figure out what time you need to wake your child from each nap in order to fit everything in. Then take a deep breath and go for it!

Oh, I also get asked this question a lot when it comes to micromanaging a nap schedule like this: "Will this discourage my baby from taking longer naps when they do transition to less naps?" And the answer is no! You won't get your baby *stuck* at shorter naps by waking them now for a period of time.

Already stressing about future nap transition? Check out my Nap Transition Guide which walks you through everything you need to know for all the major nap transitions.

 

 

For more help with your child's sleep, Everything Page. Here I offer freebies, courses, and 1:1 services for each age group!

Baby sample sleep schedules are here! I’ve had many requests for a blog like this over the years but I have to admit, I’ve been reluctant to make it. Not because I’m sitting on some kind of top-secret information but because I’ve seen many parents stress themselves out trying to follow an arbitrary schedule online.

That is not what this is! The schedules below are simply examples. They may not work at all for your child and that is okay! These sample schedules are meant to be a guide only and not a rule book that you follow religiously.

In the examples below, I’ve made them all assuming a 6:30am wake up time because I find that to be the most common time that babies wake up. If your child wakes up later, then you’d just shift the schedule accordingly! If your child wakes up earlier and you don’t like it, then I’d treat your daily schedule like they are waking up at 6am in order to help shift things later. More on early wakings here.

How do I fit feedings in with my baby’s sample sleep schedule?

Every baby is different and you know your baby best! Below are some suggestions for feeding but please do what is best for your situation.

In general, I recommend falling into a pattern of eat, play, sleep and separating the act of eating from the act of falling asleep whenever possible. This means that the bulk of your daytime feeds would happen when baby wakes up in the morning and when baby wakes up from each nap. Add in your bedtime routine feed and you’re good to go!

*If you feel your baby needs more feedings than this or is acting hungry, then you can also offer a feed about 45 minutes before naptime as well to keep it from bleeding into sleep time while still offering extra calories.

 

0-2 month sample sleep schedule

With the newborn stage, everything is highly flexible. Most likely each day will look different and that’s to be expected. Newborn sleep is especially unpredictable but the key to avoiding over-tiredness is offering naps frequently. I recommend offering naps about every 45-75 minutes depending on the age of your newborn.

Newborns will likely have 4 naps or more a day with a later morning wake up and a later bedtime. Below are a couple examples of what your day could look like with a newborn. Again, none of these are better or best. I simply want to show you how different you should expect newborn schedules to be from day to day and from baby to baby.

 

Sample sleep schedule #1 (Mixture of short and long naps)

Wake up: 7am

Nap 1: 8-10am

Nap 2: 11-12pm

Nap 3: 1-3pm

Nap 4: 4-4:30pm

Nap 5: 5:30-6pm

Nap 6: 7-7:30pm

Bedtime: 8:30pm

 

Sample sleep schedule #2 (Long naps)

Wake up: 7am

Nap 1: 8-10am

Nap 2: 11-1pm

Nap 3: 2-4pm

Nap 4: 5-6pm

Nap 5: 7-8pm

Bedtime: 9pm

 

Sample sleep schedule #3 (Short naps)

Wake up: 8am

Nap 1: 9-9:30am

Nap 2: 10:30-11am

Nap 3: 12-12:30pm

Nap 4: 1:30-2pm

Nap 5: 3-3:30pm

Nap 6: 4:30-5pm

Nap 7: 6-6:30pm

Nap 8: 7:30-8pm

Bedtime: 9pm

 

For more info about handling newborn sleep, check out my newborn sleep resource page here.

 

3-4 month sample sleep schedule

This is the stage when night sleep can start to consolidate more (especially if your child has been developing independent sleep skills). But you may also run into the 4 month sleep regression and that can come with its own challenges. See more on this regression with these blogs: How to prepare and Do’s and don’ts

Many 3-4 month olds will still be on a 4 nap schedule but some 4 month olds are taking nice long naps and are able to handle a 3 nap schedule instead.

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 8-9:30am

Nap 2: 11:15-12:15pm

Nap 3: 2:15-3:15pm

Nap 4: 5:15-6pm

Bedtime: 8pm

 

5-6 month sample sleep schedule

Most babies are solidly on 3 naps by this age range. Try your best to hang onto 3 naps until your child is at least 7 months old.

For more information on nap transitions, check out my comprehensive nap transition guide. It walks you through the 4 major nap transitions: 4 to 3, 3 to 2, 2 to 1, and 1 to 0!

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 8:30-10am

Nap 2: 12-1:30pm

Nap 3: 3:45-4:30pm

Bedtime: 7pm

 

7-8 month sample sleep schedule

7 months is the earliest I like to see babies transitioning to 2 naps. As a result of this transition to 2 naps you’ll see bedtime pulled earlier for a while but don’t be scared of the early bedtime! Bedtime may fall as early as 6pm and that’s okay! The sample schedule below is an example of what a 2 nap schedule will look like early on in the transition. But if you have a 7 or 8 month old who is still rocking 3 naps- go for it!

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 9:15-11am

Nap 2: 2-3pm

Bedtime: 6:15pm

 

9-11 month sample sleep schedule

By this age range, most babies are settling into a good 2 nap routine and able to handle slightly more awake time as you can see below.

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 9:30-11:30am

Nap 2: 3-4pm

Bedtime: 7:30pm

 

12-14 month sample sleep schedule

It’s not unusual for 12-14 month olds to start resisting the 2nd nap a bit but try as hard as you can to hang onto 2 naps until you reach that 14/15 month mark. While the second nap may become shorter and less restorative, most babies still desperately need it at this age. Without it many spiral into a cycle of over-tiredness with night wakings and early morning wakings and it can feel impossible to break out of.

You may find you need to wake your child from their first nap slightly earlier to build enough sleep pressure before you offer nap 2.

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 9:30-11am

Nap 2: 3-3:45pm

Bedtime: 7:30pm

 

15-24 month sample sleep schedule

Now your child is finally old enough for the transition to 1 nap so feel free to go for it when you’re ready! Our aim is for a lunchtime/afternoon nap that is 1.5-3 hours in length. During this adjustment to 1 nap, don’t fear the early bedtime- it’s your BFF, I promise! *Please note that in most cases you don’t want to jump from a 3 hour wake window before nap 1 to a 5-6 hour wake window. See my comprehensive nap guide for more step by step instructions so you don’t end up with a crabby, overtired toddler!

Around this age, many parents ask me what they should do with lunch time. Usually it falls right when their child should be taking their long nap and parents worry their child will be hungry and wake up early. I recommend splitting your lunch in half and offering the first half shortly before naptime and then offering second lunch after naptime.

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 11:30-1:30pm

Bedtime: 6:30pm

 

2-3 year sample sleep schedule

By this age range, most babies are settling into a good 1 nap schedule and you’ll see that nap shifting as late as 1pm and bedtime shifting later accordingly! Not much will change now for a while. It’s normal for 2 year olds to go through a nap strike but don’t be fooled. They still need that nap! Keep your typical nap time everyday- even if they aren’t sleeping- and they will get back to napping. For more about this tricky age, check out this blog: Toddler sleep and why it sucks.

 

Sample sleep schedule:

Wake up: 6:30am

Nap 1: 12:30-2:30pm

Bedtime: 7:30pm

 

3+ year sample sleep schedule

Most kiddos still need a nap until 3-5 years of age. Once you hit that stage be sure to read my Quiet Time blog. I am a big believer in keeping a daily quiet time (for your child’s sake and yours) even when they stop napping. It’s been an absolute lifesaver in my house and a great way for my kids to hone their independent play skills.

So you think you're headed for a nap transition, huh? Well, before you jump in, here are three things I wish EVERY parent knew before making the move to drop a nap. Let's dive in!

As a quick aside, if you are ready for a nap transition, I highly recommend checking out my comprehensive Nap Schedules & Transitions Bundle which walks you step by step through each of the different nap transitions your child will have.

 

1. Is your child the right age for a nap transition?

First things first. Is your child at the right age for a nap transition? Or are they too young to drop the nap that extra nap? If you try to transition them before they are fully ready and capable, you will end up with a tired and cranky baby who will start to sleep even worse! Transitions work best when they happen at the ideal ages.

Here are some general guidelines I like to use for seeing if baby is the right age for a nap transition:

• 4 to 3 naps should happen around 4-5 months
• 3 to 2 naps should happen around 7-9 months
• 2 to 1 naps should happen around 15-18 months
• 1 to 0 naps should happen around 3-5 years

If your child is not within a week or two of these lower end ages, then you are either jumping the gun or you're dealing with a different root cause of your sleep issues. There is no rush to drop a nap!

 

2. Is your child exhibiting these signs of being ready for a nap transition?

Look for these signs that your baby is needing to drop a nap:

• More frequent night wakings than usual
• Shorter naps than usual
• Early wakings than usual
• More difficulty falling asleep

These are all signs that your baby could be needing to drop a nap. However, I want you be able to see patterns with these signs rather than just having this happen a handful of times over several weeks. As a general rule of thumb, these signs should be happening about 50% of the time AND causing issues with sleep and mood, especially before you take the leap early.

I repeat- there is no rush to drop a nap!

3. Do you have a plan for handling sleep disruptions during a nap transition?

Before you even think about going through a nap transition, you need to have a plan in place. Have it in your mind, talk about it with your partner, maybe even write it down if that will help!

Your child's sleep will be disturbed during a nap transition. There is no magical way around this. So it's vital that you know how you will handle extra night wakings, short naps, overtiredness, etc. BEFORE it even happens.

If you've previously sleep trained, I recommend pulling your sleep coaching method out of your back pocket and applying it during this time. If you choose to assist your child to sleep during these extra disruptions, that is always fine. Just make sure you're honest with yourself about the habits you may be introducing. My rule of thumb is to avoid introducing habits you don't want to continue long term. Otherwise, you'll just have to make habit changes later on!

 

 

Alright, those are the top things I want you to know before you go through a nap transition!

 

How to have a life with naps... you might be surprised by our advice! We chat about managing expectations for naps on the go, the 80/20 rule, and we give you permission to do whatever works best for you and your family!

 

Relevant product links for napping on the go- https://allthesleeps.com/productsilove/

 

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Hi everyone and welcome to Sleep Talking Moms. Today we are going to talk about something that I don't know I feel like people get a little riled up about sometimes, but also necessary, very necessary. So yeah, we're going to talk about how to have a life with naps. And you may not like me and Kayla's perspective on this and that is okay. We don't get into this. We're very similar in how we think about this subject. But we know that it is not for everyone and that is 100%. Okay, so if you listen to this and feel like we're psycho, that's that's okay. You don't hurt our feelings. Not at all. And I am kind of sorry that we both came about our how we were gonna handle naps. The same way cuz I would have been much more helpful if one of us was one way or the other was the other but we have open minds about Whichever way you choose to parent just like anything else. So you gotta do it. You got to do absolutely.

 

And I guess just to you know, get the cat out the bag. When it comes to having a life with naps. Me and Kayla err on the side where we would just much rather have good naps and we don't care so much about having a life when our little ones are little and still need lots of naps. So we would 100% Choose sleep and reliable sleep and breaks during the day over being able to go around and do different things and see people and have a social life or have activities. That is that fair. Kayla, would you agree? That is very, very fair. Yes. And if you guys listen to the last episode, you will know that Carianna and I were basically squares our whole life and we sleep so there are a lot of times where we were choosing to not be social because it was a fun time. So we get it honestly. And you know I I know that it gets harder to when you have like when you have more than one child so maybe you have one that's a toddler or older who just has one nap a day at you know one reliable time or maybe they're done napping and then you have the baby who's still on 234 naps and you know, you feel bad like well, I won't be able to take my toddler out and do things I have been there.

 

Okay, well I know your experience has been a little different because that phase for you. With your kids has been during COVID. So you couldn't go anywhere even if you wanted to. Yes, yeah, right. It was kind of a gift. In a weird roundabout way. I'd never like of course, I don't want what's happening to be happening. But to have a little baby and a toddler at the height of the pandemic where we couldn't go anywhere and we were on lockdown. It was like, oh, okay, cool. Well, I guess this is what we're doing. And so our big trips were trips to the farmyard. Which are good trips, good trips. Yeah. Yeah. And when my boys were younger, and Tim was a baby, and Ethan was, you know, in the two to three range. I'm not gonna say that. We never went anywhere for Ethan to do things, but they were pretty few and far between. And I probably waited more until Campbell my younger one was on a to nap schedule. Just because two naps gives you more time in between naps to get an outing and get back home before nap time. So that's kind of our personal experience, but you can absolutely have a toddler and have a baby and do things and still have successful naps. So I don't want you to take away from this, that it's not possible. I do want you to be just kind of cognizant of your individual child because I do find a lot of this is child specific. Some are gonna be super super sensitive to having their nap schedule messed up or to having you know, a nap on the go. They're gonna be really sensitive to that not going to go smoothly. And some parents can just like they know okay, if we have a rough nap day, we're expecting a couple night wakings tonight.

 

So if you find out that that's your kid, it doesn't mean you can't go anywhere but it does mean you're going to want to kind of weigh your options more and decide okay, which is more important to me if I can't have my cake and eat it too. You know, am I gonna choose staying in more to respect these naps or am I gonna choose going out and just accepting you know, the cards I've dealt with because of it. And on the flip side, there are some kids who are so chill and easygoing that they'll have to sign for you on the go if their schedules messed up and they miss an app or two during the day, they're not going to be a rep that night, they're going to be just fine. So you kind of have to experiment a little and get to know your child and know that not all children are the same in this respect. Yes. And we're also kind of giving you guys a free pass to if you feel like I can't handle the stress of not like not going and doing things because my kids sleep schedule is so important. We give you full permission to be a square like if you need that because your stress level is too high juggling all the things that you have to juggle then don't feel like you have to do anything.

 

But also if there are those things that pop up things that you want to do realize that it's you're gonna have a messed up day, and then just resume business as usual. The next and it will it will be okay. Yeah, absolutely. And I have parents a lot ask me, like, if I go out, you know, when we you know, take take my child to the library and we don't get home in time for nap. Is this going to ruin everything and start us back at square one? No, it's not going to ruin everything. Now if I'm specifically working with a family who is going through the sleep training process, I'm going to recommend you don't do those things for a limited period. of time where we are just focused on learning. But after that period of time, you're never going to go all the way back to square one. You may like a well said have a rougher day but it's not going to set you back at zero as far as sleep and every all the routines and habits that you've created for them not gonna start you back at square zero. All right, so like what we've kind of been talking about with like, if you want your cake and eat it too, all of that stuff when it comes to to naps and having a life I've heard of I think I've heard you talk before about the 8020 rule. But what is that?

Yeah, yes, the 8020 rule. And you've probably heard this about other aspects of life too. It's a pretty common phrase. I'm sure our listeners have heard the 8020 rule. When it comes to sleep and naps is 80% of the time. We want to aim for naps in the ideal environment and at the right time. 80% of time, that's kind of our goal. And then 20% of the time if we're off track and the nap has to be in a non ideal environment in the car or in the stroller and at a non ideal time. Maybe they're skipping the nap. That's okay, so we can kind of find that 8020 balance. That's what's going to help them to not be so thrown off by nap disruption and changes that they're miserable but also gives you as a parent freedom to go and do things here and there. And when we do have to have naps on the go, you know, there are definitely things we can do to help improve the quality of those naps. Things like taking white noise with you and you know, if they're in the car seat, you're driving around and they need to be napping, you know, putting the white noise back there by them or I've had parents play it through the Bluetooth system in their car so the whole car is white noise.

 

I also put a blanket in the window to get it to start doing possibly can but that's a good that's a good idea. And another option you can do I don't know if you guys have heard of SnoozeShade it is like a black they make one for strollers and for car seats a cover that so it kind of creates that dark environment that very, very dark environment. So those are good options as well to kind of recreate the ideal environment. I've had a lot of families by this new shade if their schedule kind of makes it so as as they're driving home from daycare, if they have a bit of a commute. They know that that's when they need their third nap of the day to happen is on that drive home. And so they will just always have that white noise in the car. Had their sushi and the child just snaps for that 20 or 30 minute ride home. So definitely things we can do to make naps better on the go.

 

But the other thing I want you to just kind of grab onto and accept is that naps on the go are never going to be as good as naps at home in their ideal environment. And I think we get we get fixated on that like oh I want them to be able to nap while on the go. That's just not how humans are built. I don't know about you okay, what do you nap well in a car as well as my bed? No, yeah, you can do it. And it's better than you know. No sleep, right? Yeah. But yeah, it is not going to be that ideal sleep. It's not going to be as good a quality just like you may not sleep as well in a hotel room outside of your usual house and bed or you may not sleep as well at your in laws house. Babies are the same way. And so we can't expect them to nap to the same level of sleep as they do when they're at home in their perfect environment. And one thing I just want you guys to remember is that this you know having no life or having a life that's disrupted by sleep schedules for kids. Even conflicting sleep schedules for kids. I remember that very well. I remember, you know, like, Ellis would wake up or else would be awake. I put tiny down I put Alice down for his nap. And then my little one would get up and just being like, I don't have a single solitary second to myself this whole day. Probably added some expletives and that's intense.

 

Just like anything else, this is not gonna last forever. At some point your kids are you know, like, my youngest is two now he has one nap. I was in for quiet time. Like at some point it does all kind of come together. They won't have naps forever. So it's gonna suffer a little bit and then it's gonna be totally fine. But you'll have a well rested kid. And hopefully yourself will be you'll be well rested too. So hang in there. Yeah, I think that's a really important reminder. Because when you're in it, you know, it can feel like oh my gosh, I haven't gone anywhere for months, but in the scheme of our child's life. It is such a small, small point in time when we just have so many naps and I remember those days to Kayla, I think the worst is when you have one kid on to naps and the other kid on one nap because there is just there's literally almost no overlap. Yeah, and you're just like nap. Okay, next nap. Okay, next nap and then it's dinnertime and you're like, I haven't. I haven't had any time by myself at all. Yep. Or like you have like 15 minutes between you're like, should I get a quick workout? Should I do the dishes? Should I just sit like yeah, it's not fun. It's not but what happens because of that good sleep can be fun. So it'll get there it'll get there.

 

Well, I hope that this podcast didn't feel like a downer for you if you were hoping for like some quick fix. Yeah, quick because you guys know we don't think quick fixes exist in parenting. I so wish they did but they just don't but I hope that the commiseration helps and just that if you view sleep the same way that we do and you're cool with like, Yeah, I'd rather stay home and just have good sleep. You're not alone. And I will also tell you even though Kayla and I can't relate if you're someone who's like you know what, I just need my baby to be on my schedule. I know plenty of people that that works just fine for so there's no shame in that game either. And be sure guys to stay tuned this week on Instagram and Facebook. I'm gonna be talking more about how to do naps on the go ways to make it work for you. So stay tuned for more info and thank you for joining us. Thank you guys have a good week.

Today I'm sharing my short naps checklist with you! I recently received this question from one of my followers:

"Help! My 8 month old only takes 30 minutes naps! Her naps are always 30 minutes, right on the dot! How do I get past these short naps?"

I get this question a lot so I decided to create a checklist to help parents find the culprit of these short naps.

*This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my privacy and disclosure statement for more information.

 

 

 

#1 Is their napping environment ideal?

⇒Your child's room needs to be dark at nap time. And I mean REALLY dark! It should be as close to pitch black as you can make it. Light signals to their brain that it's time to be awake so we don't want to send those signals if we struggle with short naps.

It takes some effort to get their napping environment pitch black, but I promise, the pay off is worth it! One product that I highly recommend and personally use for blacking out a room is BlackoutEZ Window Covers.

 

⇒You're child needs continuous white noise playing while they nap. This not only helps to block out the daytime sounds within the house (putting dishes away, walking up the stairs, etc) but it also acts as a great buffer to block out sounds from outside the home (neighbor mowing the lawn, dog barking, etc).

White noise provides a continuous, non stimulating, sound that studies show us play a role in helping us fall asleep faster, sleep deeper, and connect sleep cycles.

My go-to white noise company is Lectrofan. We own 4 different Lectrofan sound machines in my house! And you can read more about why white noise is a non-negotiable for good sleep here.

#2 Is your baby taking the correct number of naps for their age?

This is important for many reasons. The ideal number of naps for your child's age helps us to balance their sleep needs with their awake needs. If we are offering too few naps throughout the day, it's likely that your child is going into nap time overtired. This state of over tiredness can increase cortisol and adrenaline within their body which will lead to full wake ups after 1 sleep cycle and voila, you've got a short nap!

If we are offering too many naps throughout the day, it's likely that your child is going into nap time under tired. This means they haven't built up adequate sleep pressure to take a longer nap!

 

#3 Is the timing of your naps right?

Not only is the number of naps important, but the timing is as well. It's important to find the right amount of time for your child to be awake between each sleep. It may take some tweaking to get right but once you hit that sweet spot, you'll know!

For a month by month breakdown of nap needs, check out my Short Nap Guide. 

#4 Is it age appropriate for your baby to be taking short naps?

I find that short naps can be age-appropriate until 3-5 months. Definitely as a newborn, you can expect short naps and that is okay! If you've got a child who is 3+ months and you're still struggling with consistent short naps (45 minutes or less) then I'd say it's okay to start working on this checklist to troubleshoot.

#5 Does your child know how to fall asleep without help?

This is the most important piece because if your child is taking short naps, that means they are getting through 1 sleep cycle and then unable to connect to the next sleep cycle. It's totally normal for them to wake up briefly between sleep cycles.

But if they don't possess the skill to put themselves back to sleep without intervention (paci, nursing, rocking, being held, etc.) then they aren't going to be able to connect those nap cycles. If your child doesn't know how to fall asleep without help and you are struggling with short naps, you have 2 options:

1. Go in as soon as they wake from a short nap and help them right back to sleep with whatever you've found to be the most effective (nursing back to sleep, rocking to sleep, laying with them, etc.)
2. Or, you can take this opportunity to teach them the skill of independent sleep!

Have you ever wondered why babies naps in the first place? In this episode I break down the 2 systems that govern our sleep and specifically the one that influences napping behavior. If you're a science nerd or just like to learn the why behind certain things, you'll love this episode!

 

Nap Training Mini Course

Short Nap Guide- freebie.allthesleeps.com/shortnaps

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Episode 11: Why do babies nap?

why do babies nap Hey everyone, and welcome back to sleep talking moms, Kayla and Carianna here. And today we are on episode 11. And we are going to be talking about why do babies nap? So this is the science behind naps. Yay. Yay, yes, this is so important. It's important to know what's happening when they nap and why we do it. So let's go ahead and start off with Why do okay, so why we sleep there couple, I would say there are two different systems if you want to call it that, that govern our sleep. And the first system that is much more in line with our night sleep is our circadian rhythm. So we've probably all heard that term. It's basically just our 24 hour clock, our 24 hour internal clock. And it's dictated by melatonin and cortisol by those two hormones. So Melatonin is higher at night when we're sleeping. Cortisol is higher during the day when we're awake. And then like we talked about a couple episodes ago, when we got into all the science behind sleep environments, we know that light and dark, hot and cold that those things also play a role in our circadian rhythm and signaling when it's time to sleep when it's time to be awake. So you know, to throw throw a little science term out at you, we have a part of our brain called our super charismatic nucleus. And that is basically where our circadian rhythm is all coming from. It's that one centered place that's sending receiving signals all day, every day. Awesome. Okay, and so if we know why we sleep, why do we nap? What is that sec why do babies nap ond system? Yeah, so like I said that circadian rhythm mainly is dealing with our night's sleep, we're not producing melatonin during the day. So that's not the system that is causing our little ones to nap. Or even you know, for some of us adults who may nap here and there. That's the melatonin isn't playing a role in that daytime napping. So the second system is sleep pressure. And basically there's a chemical called adenosine that builds up in your brain while you're awake. And basically, every minute you're awake, it's building and building and building. And then when it finally reaches, you know, a high enough point that you go to sleep, then while you're sleeping, your brain kind of like starts clearing it so that when you wake up again, it's it's not back to zero. It's significantly clearer than it was before. That's actually really interesting, isn't it? I know. It's super interesting. So I have a fun fact about adenosine and it's actually about caffeine. So this doesn't really apply to babies. But I think as moms we will find this interesting. Kayla, are you a coffee drinker? You are right. Yes, I drink one cup in the morning and then sometimes I have to pick me up at one. You are not a coffee drinker. Now you don't have any caffeine except for chocolate. Yeah, Chocolate. Chocolate is my main form of caffeine, which, to be fair, I probably eat the same amount of chocolate needed in you know, a cup of coffee. Same amount of caffeine. And yeah, I'm not a coffee drinker. I don't like the taste of coffee. I think it smells good. I will eat or not eat. I will drink like Starbucks drinks, but they basically have to be like ice cream drinks. I'm not getting them for coffee, you know? Yeah, that's reasonable. And you don't drink soda? I don't I do on occasion. Like if we're out to eat sometimes I will. But yeah, I don't really drink much soda, either. So caffeine. Why do you drink coffee? Kayla? I Well, at this point. It's tech why do babies nap nically to wake me up. But I'm also very aware that it's because it's a habit at this point. I've got a problem. That's okay. That's alright. Um, so yeah, what caffeine does is it actually tricks you into feeling alert. So caffeine blocks the receptors in your brain that adenosine would cling on To sew Even though the adenosine is continuing to build up in your brain, you're not know your brain doesn't know it. And so you're not feeling tired. So I thought that was really interesting. And that is, yeah, and this just to give you an idea not not to rip on my caffeine people are my coffee drinkers, but caffeine is like, insane. And so NASA did a study, I think it was in the 80s or 90s. I don't know for sure. So don't quote me on that. If I could find the the study and remember to put it in the show notes. I will. But they gave spiders data, different drugs. So they gave some spiders, LSD, they gave some spiders speed. They gave some marijuana and they gave somewhy do babies nap  caffeine. Okay, so these poor spiders. Well, some of them may have been having a really good Yes. They let them you know, like, go about their day or whatever, and build spider webs. And then they compared the spider webs. And it's pretty insane. Like, if I don't put the link in the show notes, you should just google like NASA spider web, caffeine, something like that. Because with like with marijuana, the spider webs looked pretty normal with LSD and speed. They looked like a little wonky. But you could still tell it was a spider web. And with caffeine, it was like, not recognizable as your typical spider web pattern. It was crazy crazy to see the difference in the pictures and just kind of what effect it has on our brains. Is that why you don't drink caffeine? That is not why I don't drink caffeine. It's not stopping you. Oh, we learned about that a year or two ago and I've always hated coffee. So it's, I can't I can't pretend that that's why. Okay, so back to babies. Yes. Why? Why do babies nap? Obviously, we talked about how adenosine works. And, you know, we know that as adults, we may nap here and there, but we don't need naps to function. And we also talked about melatonin does not come into play for naptime. Okay? Melatonin is an evening hormone. So naps with babies. It's all about building that sleep pressure. And since we know that babies need naps, and that the time that they spend a week that increases as they get older, then we can kind of conclude that that adenosine is building up quicker, the younger they are. So that's why we may see a newborn really only able to be awake about 45 to 60 minutes. But then we see you know, an 18 month old who's able to be awake for five to six hours. So the speed at which that is building up and the speed at which they're feeling like okay, I need to sleep or it's going to be meltdown mode that is gradually stretching out more and more. And that's why, you know, when we get into the toddler, hopefully more towards the preschooler age, they're just going to stop napping, because that pressure is not building enough for them to have to take a nap that day. Awesome. Well, a lot of good information here. A lot of important information, it's important to know why our kids are doing these things, and also why we sometimes need to do these things. So what are what are some things that you can offer to families who are struggling with naps in particular? Yeah. Oh, I'm so glad you asked me that, Kayla. Not that I told you, I went to talk about this or anything. Um, so at the end of this week, I'm actually launching my nap training mini course. That is Yes, yeah, I'm so excited. It's been something I've wanted to do for a while. And now that my boys are in school, I've actually had the time and energy to put into creating it. So basically, it is for four to 24 months. Particularly if your child is in a crib, it's going to work best if they're in their own sleep space, and they're contained. But it's a self paced course, it's designed for babies who already fall asleep on their own at night. So maybe bedtime is is going pretty smooth, but you're still really struggling with naps. It's most specifically designed for those families. Now, if you don't have knightstown, and you don't have naps down, a better option would be my sleep coaching Crash Course because that tackles at all. But if you've got knightstown they're going down independently, then this nap training mini course would be more your speed more of what you need. And it basically just sets up a day by day plan for working towards independent nap. So you're able to put them down in their sleep space awake. They're able to fall asleep. You've got all the timing right. You'll learn all About that, and they'll learn to lengthen those naps too. So if you're stuck with some crappy 2030 minute naps, it will walk you through how to work through those and get them to nap longer. So that is coming out this Friday. Actually, if you want to purchase it at the presale price, I'll have the link in the show notes so you can grab it, but it officially will launch and be available this Friday. And I'm really excited about it. Yay. All right. So we hope that you enjoy the learning a little more of the science behind sleep, night's sleep and naps particularly. Thanks for joining us and we want to keep this episode short and sweet. So we will see you again next week. Bye. Thank you so much for listening to the sleep talking moms podcast. We hope you are walking away from this episode feeling empowered and encouraged to tackle your sleep issues. If you enjoyed the episode, please take a second to grab a screenshot, share it in your Instagram stories and tag us at all the sleeps. See you next time.

Gearing up for your next nap transition? Then this blog is for you!

 

What are signs that I should drop a nap?

First off is age. Transitions work best when they happen at the following ages:

4 to 3 naps at 4 months

3 to 2 naps between 7 and 9 months

2 to 1 naps between 15 and 18 months

1 to 0 naps between 3 and 5 years

 

Secondly, here are some signs once you're within the recommended age range:

1. Unusual night wakings
2. Earlier morning wake ups than usual
3. Inability to fall asleep for some or all naps
4. Waking up happy from short naps
5. Struggling to offer enough awake time between sleeps while also keeping bedtime before 8pm

 

Now, we like to see a pattern with these 5 signs rather than just a random weird night here or there. If things are going well for the most part, then there’s no reason to drop a nap ASAP! 

How do I drop a nap?

4 naps to 3 naps (At 4 months)

This is probably the easiest transition you’ll go through! It will involve moving bedtime quite a bit earlier to account for the lost nap and this can be hard, especially if you’re dealing with short naps (be sure to check out my free guide for short naps!)

 

Things to know for this transition:

✩Start by stretching your wake windows. 

✩Once you’ve maxed out your wake windows at roughly 1.75-2 hours, then it’s time to make the switch and drop nap 4.

✩Bedtime may be after 8pm before the transition and as early as 6pm after the transition, this is okay!

 

3 naps to 2 naps (At 7-9 months)

This transition isn’t quite as easy as 4 to 3 but it’s still fairly straight forward. It can get a bit messier because I find that nap 3 can be pretty elusive as you get closer to this transition. If you find yourself in a pattern of consistently missing nap 3, it might be time!

 

Things to know for this transition:

✩Start by stretching your wake windows.

✩Once you’ve maxed out your wake windows at roughly 2.5-2.75 hours, then it’s time to make the switch and drop nap 3.

✩There may be some flip-flopping between 2 and 3 nap days and that’s okay. But if it persists past 7-10 days, then I’d commit to 2 nap days and push through

✩Again, bedtime will be on the later end right before the transition and then jump to early right after the transition. This gives them the chance to make up for the lost nap and to recover from the longer wake windows

2 naps to 1 nap (At 15-18 months)

This one is the BIG one! Such a big transition for your little one and this transition will take time. Buckle up for 2-4 weeks of transitioning and rougher than usual sleep. The goal with this transition is to be prepared and do it slowly.

 

Things to know for this transition:

✩Hitting 15 months does not mean that you HAVE to transition. If sleep is going fine, then don’t rush it.

✩You’ll start by pushing nap 1 later and later.

✩Once nap 1 is ending late enough, that’s when you’ll cut out the second nap completely.

✩Again, bedtime will be on the later end right before the transition and then jump to early right after the transition. This gives them the chance to make up for the lost nap and to recover from the longer wake windows

 

1 nap to no nap (At 3-5 years)

This is the transition that I find happens more naturally. We REALLY want to keep that nap until at least 3 years of age, so if you find yourself with a 2 year old who is trying to drop their nap, it’s probably more related to limit testing than them being physically ready to drop it. Be sure to check out my blog about Toddler Sleep And Why It Sucks if this is you!

 

Things to know for this transition:

✩For a while you may flip flop between nap days and no nap days, this is totally okay! Go with it!

✩On no nap days, don’t be afraid to pull bedtime earlier to make up for the lack of a nap.

✩On nap days, it’s okay to wake them from their nap in order to make bedtime easier. Ideally we’d want their nap ending by 3pm but you can cut it off earlier if you need to!

✩Even once the nap is gone, you still want to keep a daily quiet time in place. See this post for a more detailed overview of how to introduce quiet time for your preschooler.

 

Hope this was helpful and don’t forget, for children who are independent sleepers already, I offer nap transition calls so that you don’t have to go through this alone!

As I type this post, my 3 and 5 year old are having their daily quiet time in their rooms. When I tell people that my boys have this time daily for about 2 hours, most parents are amazed and ask, “How can I get my child to stay in their room quietly for quiet time each day?!”

 

Not only is quiet time extremely beneficial for kids but it gives moms and dads a much needed mid day break as well. Honestly, I would have lost my sanity quite a while ago without daily quiet time. I’m not going to go into WHY quiet time is important in this post but feel free to do some extra reading if you’d like! 

So let’s talk about some of the specifics of this elusive quiet time.

 

*This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my privacy and disclosure statement for more information.

 

What is quiet time for toddlers and preschoolers?

Quiet time is simply a period of unstructured, calm time for your child. This usually takes place in your child’s room. And is an opportunity for their bodies and brains to rest and slow down once their afternoon nap has gone away. I recommend doing this everyday so that it’s never a fight and your child will grow to expect it.

When should I introduce quiet time for my child?

Ideally, your child would continue napping until at least 3 years of age and then once that nap was disappearing, you would start to introduce quiet time (more on how to do this below). I caution you not to introduce quiet time too early though. If you have a child under 3 who is struggling with naps, be sure to check out my blog on Toddler Sleep. 

Currently my 5 year old still has a daily quiet time and I intend for him to continue it until he starts kindergarten in the fall. Even once he’s in kindergarten, I plan to give him a shorter quiet time since he will be home by 2:40pm. I know he’ll need it even more after a full day of school and business. 

For more info on when your toddler may stop napping, check out this post by Snooze.net: When do toddlers stop napping?

How long should quiet time be?

I like to see quiet time lasting anywhere from 45 minutes to 2 hours. And I’ll be honest, a lot of days, I push my boys’ time to 3 hours (this is when I get most of my work done)! If quiet time is a brand new concept for your toddler or preschooler, I suggest starting small and working your way up. Start at first with about 15-20 minutes. Then you can gradually increase from there. 

Having a visual way for your child to see how much time is left can be really helpful, especially as they are getting used to this new habit. It will help them visually see how much time has passed and how much time is left. This particular one can be set up to 2 hours but they also make shorter (and cheaper) ones as well!

Another great option to visually show your child when their quiet time is up is the Mella Toddler Clock (save 10% with code: allthesleeps10). It has a built in nap timer that you can set for as little as 15 minutes and up to 3 hours! When the time is up, it turns green and your child knows that quiet time is over!

How should I introduce quiet time?

This is where it can get a little more complicated but I’m going to give you some tips and ideas depending on your current situation.

 

Situation 1:

Your child stopped napping a while ago and you are looking for a way to reintroduce that daily rest and quiet time. If this is you, I’d start small like I mentioned above. Start at 15 minutes a day and gradually increase it until quiet time is 45 minutes to 2 hours long. If you know it will be like pulling teeth to get your child to stay in their room without you, start by staying in the room with them. Take something for yourself to do (book, laptop, laundry, etc) and tell them that it’s quiet time. You don’t have to ignore them but avoid giving in and playing with them or and keep any interaction to a bare minimum.

Once they get more comfortable with that, then you can start excusing yourself to go use the bathroom, wash the dishes, or something else while they stay in their room. If they try to leave their room, be sure to enforce it rather than just letting it slide. That will help them to stop testing those boundaries around quiet time. 

Situation 2:

Your child naps some days but not reliably and you think that you probably aren’t far from naps ending.

If this is you, we still want to keep naps in place as long as your child needs them. But if you notice they are only napping about half the days of the week, you can start to give them quiet time days throughout the week.

Go through the days of the week with your child and let them pick which ones will be nap days and which ones will be quiet time days. If you know they have a busy morning on certain days, try to retain the nap on those afternoons. Save quiet time for your laid back days instead.

By letting your child go through with you and choose, we are giving them some control back and helping them to accept the naps on nap days. Obviously on nap days, we wouldn’t let them have any toys or supplies or in their rooms since we want them napping.

 

Situation 3:

Your child still naps everyday but you want to be as prepared as possible for when those naps start going away.

Yay! If your child is still napping, keep it up! Most 3 year olds still need a nap so you’re doing great. Even if your child runs into a temporary nap strike, keep pushing forward with nap time versus quiet time. Once you’ve had several weeks of nap refusals AND staying consistent, that’s when it’s a sign that you can start to gradually introduce quiet time. 

*Note: If your child was napping everyday previously and suddenly starts resisting every single nap, this is much more likely to be regression or testing related rather than a sign that they don’t need a nap. This is when it’s important to remain consistent around your routines and avoid over-helping to sleep at nap time.

More tips and tricks:

1. Have a quiet time box. Fill it with simple activities that your child can do without your help. If they will need your help to do puzzles, avoid putting those kinds of items in there. This could be things like Legos, blocks, coloring, race cars, books, dolls, stickers etc. 
2. I suggest having a box because it’s easy to transport in and out of their room. This box should be removed for bedtime and if you are keeping naps on some day then the box should be removed those days as well.
3. Keep this box special just for quiet time. Try to avoid letting your child play with these specific items outside of quiet time. This keeps the box of goodies more special and can act as a motivator to look forward to.
4. Be sure that you only provide items to play with that you trust your child with. I allow itty bitty Lego pieces with my boys but that’s because I know they will not be putting them in their mouths. I don’t yet allow my 3 year old to have markers because I’m not entirely sure he won’t draw on the walls! Keep it age-appropriate. 🙂   

 

Personally speaking, I cannot express to you guys how much having a daily quiet time has benefited my boys. My oldest spends the entire time making lego creations, playing pretend in his room, and drawing masterpieces. It is truly a joy to watch the ways he has learned to entertain and grow his mind without my help at all! 

 

My younger son is still newer to quiet time so he’s still figuring things out but he has also grown into playing pretend on his with his race cars and singing lots of songs during his time. 

 

Lastly, it has made such a difference for ME as well! Being a mom of 2 boys while working from home is no easy feat but this daily quiet time gives me the chance to sit down and catch my breath.