Have you been hearing and seeing the message that sleep training is basically neglect? Listen in to hear the perspective of a pediatric sleep consultant and a social worker. Oh, and we're also moms! We have some thoughts about the lack of evidence and the dismissal of current research going on with this movement.

Sleep training: What does the research say about it?
Sleep Myth #7 Sleep training is damaging
Sleep training will NOT damage your baby

Also, be sure to check out my Instagram and go through my 'Anti-Sleep Training' and 'Research' highlights.

Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, etc.

Episode 3: Thoughts on the Anti Sleep Training Movement

Anti sleep training movement Welcome back guys, we're excited to have you here for episode three, and we're going to be talking about something that is maybe a little controversial, we're going to talk about the anti sleep training philosophy that's out there, I'm sure that you've encountered it. I know I encounter it often, and I am actively trying to not encounter it so I'm sure you as moms are seeing it.

Anti sleep training movement Yes, if you've searched anything on Instagram ever about sleep training, you're probably getting it in your feed. Yes, probably. So, before we kind of dive in and talk about it, I do want to share a little bit about my philosophy when it comes to sleep training, just to kind of level the playing field a little bit and be clear. So, I believe that sleep training is a valid and safe option for families who need it. This is also backed up by the research, but I never ever want to have families feel like they need to sleep train, or like they should sleep train okay so not putting that on you at all, if you're struggling, and the things you're trying aren't working. I do very strongly believe that sleep training can help, and can make an improvement in sleep for your whole family, but it's not a necessity, you're not going to harm your child by not sleep training, you're not going to put them at a disadvantage by not sleep training. So I just want to be very clear about that, because my philosophy really is open, right, I'm here if you need help, I'm here to provide resources if you want them, but I am not about shoving myself on people or convincing people that they need to sleep train. I do, I do free calls with families who are, you know, considering my services, and I can't tell you how many times I actually end up telling a family. You guys aren't ready, or this is not the right step or your child is not the right age for the expectations you're seeking. So, not at all, someone who is like get, let's sleep train all the babies let's you know, have everyone sleeping through the night from zero weeks like, not at all. Oh I roll. So on that note, Kayla I want to ask you, kind of about your opinion with the anti sleep training narrative, your thoughts as a mom, and as a professional as well. Sure. I am very familiar with both sleep training and anti sleep training and kind of what both are about naturally is a mother that was sleep deprived and researching what would be best for my child. I came across both sides of the issue. The thing is is that as I educated myself and I researched, I came across, like very polarizing articles. But within those articles those opinion articles, I came across a lot of research that finds that sleep training or not sleep training does not seem to impact a child's development. So, or their bonding to the parent. I can tell you I sleep trained, both of my children. And I believe that they love me very much. And I just knew that personally, for me, that I was going to be a better parent, if I could provide my children with structure, and myself with structure. But also, if I was able to get sleep, I think, from like a social work standpoint what it boils down to is like Karina said, If you are in a place that you feel like you want to sleep train, awesome, if you're in a place where you feel like this is not for me, that's great too. I think that the, the most important thing that you need to look at is how you are responding to your child, day in and day out. If you are able to respond to your child in a loving and caring way, when they're having their tantrums when, whatever it is when they're misbehaving, if you can respond to them in a caring and loving way, with however much sleep, or however you're doing it, then, then that's the important bonding developmental that you need, that those issues, but if you feel like this is not working, I'm crabby. I'm not the greatest person right now, then obviously it's something needs to change right and so I think it's great that Carrie and I has the free call, so that she can kind of give you just a very generic like, you know what it sounds like you could benefit from my services, yeah I love how you said that Kayla, because it really is looking at the whole picture right, our whole picture of our day, our mood our mental health. Our child looking at everything together. Anti sleep training movement And so to just, you know right off the bat say oh well sleep training is harmful. We can't say that in like a flat way for every circumstance because we're not looking at the whole picture, we don't actually know how the sleep deprivation is negatively affecting mom, or the family or the child, you know, right, yeah, having that like wholesome perspective, is really important. Yes and I think that it is important to look at, Okay. Is my child, you know, sleeping appropriately for them. Am I getting enough sleep, because sleep is so important to every single humans, development, and how they function. And so that's why for me. I had to sleep train. Yeah, yeah, and we were talking about this a little before we have done. And, you know, I can totally, totally get on board with this idea of wanting to go about parenting in a more quote unquote natural way right and I'm not doing sleep training, I think that's totally fine I mean I have friends that that parent that way and I don't have any issue with that at all. I think that the issue comes when we say that's the only way, or that is the right way to do it, because for many families they're doing it, and they are still, like, just struggling, they are not thriving while they do it. And so it's not the right option for them, you know, maybe for someone else, but not for them. Yeah, and I think that my biggest problem when I was, you know, reading through all the articles and the research and everything. The biggest thing is is that there's already so much guilt, you know, surrounded by breastfeeding bottle feeding formula when you're feeding that are you doing enough time you time, like there's already going back now to. Yeah, going back to work, staying at home mom, like, there's so many things that are coming at you. And so, to release these articles that are you know shaming mothers. Either way, especially when the research can't really is inconclusive, about what sleep training or not, does for a child's development. I don't know I just think it feels icky, like, we're already having a hard enough time and obviously if you're looking at this stuff then you're struggling. And so, less hate man just less hate. I agree, I agree, more understanding and accepting, and, yes, yes. Anti sleep training movement And I think the bottom line for me, and I want to talk a little about the research that we do have, and then talk a little, you know, anecdotal evidence from my experience with families, you know, bottom line is that the research we do have about sleep training and I will concede we can always use more research, you know, always, always, always use more research, but the research that we do have does not currently show any harm from sleep training does not show negative long term effects, and what we actually see instead is that it provides positive outcomes for moms, helping them get better sleep helping them, their mental health. We see that the day to day behavior of babies is also improved through sleep training so not only do we see no harm no negative effects, but we see the positives as well. And that's that's just huge and on the flip side, we have no studies we have zero studies that show any type of harm from sleep training. So, that is I think really, really important to know when you are looking at the information, and I'm going to link in the show notes because I have several blog posts, where I have written on this topic and where I have linked studies. So if you're someone who wants to go and do your research and read, which I encourage you to do if you're struggling, you guys. Yes, I encourage you to do that so I will link some blog posts in the show notes so you can go read those resources yourself, And, you know, make your own opinion about them. And then, you know from the anecdotal side the families that I've worked with, I just, I feel like what I've seen there echoes so well with the research that we have where babies will be happier during the day, they're not spending all day fussing and upset. Anti sleep training movement They are much just much more open to exploring I have a lot of babies where once we sleep train, they will like, almost right away within our two weeks start learning a new skill, you know, because I know it's so exciting, like, oh, they just started rolling over they just started standing or walking, and, and I truly feel that it is because of the renewed energy they have, as well as you know when you are kind of constantly having to hold the child for their sleep, they don't have the chance to kind of work on some of that independent skill or independent play, and so when we give them the opportunities to do that, it can just make such a difference. So that's you know anecdotally, what I found, we always want to defer to the research first, but I can honestly tell you I wouldn't still be doing my job and what I'm doing, if I didn't just see the massive rewards and payouts for families from doing it. I'm sure we will talk about this more in the future and more. Dad always talk about this I think for Yes, days and days, I could go I could go on and on so we're gonna keep this one short and sweet, but if you guys are wanting to kind of learn more understand more about my philosophy and just some of the research behind it. If you head to my Instagram profile at all the sleeps, I have two story highlights one called anti sleep training, the other called research so I highly recommend that you go check those out. And you know, always feel free to reach out if you have questions I think this is an important thing to talk about. And if you're at all struggling or feeling like you're, you know, just kind of stuck between these two philosophies, feel free to reach out and I'm happy to, you know, just kind of talk through it with you. We are so glad you joined us for the sleep talking mods podcast today. If you enjoyed this episode, please take a second to grab a screenshot, share it in your stories and tag us of all the sleeps. See you next time. Anti sleep training movement