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Weaning your child off the pacifier can feel like a daunting task, especially when it comes to sleep. After all, that little comfort object has likely become a key part of your child’s bedtime routine. But as much as the pacifier has helped soothe your baby to sleep, there comes a time when it’s best to say goodbye. Whether you’re concerned about dental health, sleep dependency, or you’re just ready for a change, weaning off the pacifier doesn’t have to be a nightmare.
In this blog, we’ll explore two effective approaches to pacifier weaning—cold turkey and gradual reduction—and provide tips on products that can help make the process smoother. We’ll also tackle common concerns, like thumb-sucking habits, whether to allow pacifier use during non-sleep times, and the role pacifiers play in SIDS protection. Ready to help your little one transition to a pacifier-free sleep routine? Let’s dive in!
Two approaches to weaning the pacifier
Once you've decided to wean the pacifier (read this blog if you haven’t made it to this point yet) you may feel like you have no idea where to start... Well here are 2 different approaches you can try!
Cold Turkey Approach- This is my preferred method for all ages. It's less confusing than other methods and avoids prolonging the discomfort and frustration that your child will go through.
You simply stop offering the pacifier at bedtime. Make sure you have a sleep coaching method that you feel comfortable with and apply that if they struggle. Then when they get better at falling asleep without it at bedtime, you start to gradually take it away from naps as well!
*When dealing with a toddler on only 1 nap, I recommend removing it at bedtime on night 1 and then also removing it from nap the following day. This will be much less confusing for the toddler age.
Offer the Paci 1x- This is not my favorite approach but if I work with families that are very resistant or nervous about removing the pacifier, this can be an option. In this scenario we offer the paci initially at put down time, and then one more time if it falls out. But after that, we aren't replacing it over and over all night or all nap time. This allows your child to learn to sleep with or without it!
Along with that, you can place multiple pacifiers in the crib with your child to make it easier for them to find and replace themselves. It’s also important to note that once your child *can* replace the pacifier themselves, we are NEVER replacing it for them. If they are capable, then they are 100% in charge of their own pacifier.
Should I cut the tip of the pacifier to gradually wean my child?
No, I do NOT recommend cutting the tip of the pacifier. It can mess with the integrity of the pacifier and there is a choking hazard if you take this route. I repeat, I do not recommend this. Instead I'd recommend purchasing the pacifier weaning system like this one. Fridababy’s weaning system has a series of different sized pacifiers that can help your child become less and less interested in the pacifier over time. This is a much better option than cutting or altering your current pacifiers. However, this weaning system is not necessary and I lean towards just applying one of the two approaches I laid out above.
What if my child starts sucking their thumb instead?
First off, just because you take the pacifier away, that does not guarantee that the child will start sucking their thumb instead. I’d say I see it go 50/50. Half the time a child will find their hand and suck on it when the pacifier is gone. The other half of the time a child will not use sucking as a soothing way to fall asleep anymore.
However, even if your child starts to suck their thumb, that is still preferable to the pacifier. Their thumb is always readily so it does not disrupt sleep in the same way a pacifier can.
If your child becomes a thumb sucker, yeah, you will have to wean that too eventually. You may have heard someone say that “You can’t take their thumb away!” but that doesn’t mean you won’t have options to wean them off their thumb in the future. Those options include things like band-aids on their thumbs, special nail polish, etc. (We personally used band-aids around age 4-5 years plus talking about it and prepping our child when we broke the thumb sucking habit)
Can I let my child use the pacifier during the day?
This is a common question I get when talking about weaning the pacifier from sleep. Parents want to know if the pacifier should just be gone for good or if it’s still okay to use during the day or for travel. My answer is, it depends!
If we are talking about a 2+ year old, then my recommendation is to cut it from daytime use as you cut it from nighttime use. At this age, the longer you keep it around, the more emotionally attached your child will become. It just makes sense and is more consistent and kind to 100% remove it now as opposed to keeping it for daytime use only to wean that another 6 months or so down the line.
If we are talking about a baby who is not needing to get rid of it during daytime yet, then it’s totally fine to still offer the pacifier when they are awake. The main thing we want to keep separated is sleep in their crib and the pacifier. But during awake time the pacifier is fine. Honestly, even during long car rides where you’re hoping they will sleep or anytime they are needing to sleep outside of their ideal environment, then using the pacifier as a helpful tool is probably fine.
At the same time, if you know that keeping the pacifier around and having access to it will just be too tempting for yourself and your baby, then by all means, get rid of them completely. The last thing you want to do is spend time weaning your baby off the pacifier for sleep only to reintroduce during a rough patch in the future. Do what’s best for your family!
But doesn’t the pacifier protect against SIDS? Should I keep it for that reason?
Great question! When talking about safe sleep there are such things as preventative factors and such things as protective factors. Let’s break those down a bit. Preventative factors are the ABCs (Alone, Back, Crib). These are things that directly reduce the risk of SIDS and ASSB. Read more on safe sleep basics here.
Protective factors are things that can help. But it's important to understand that NOT using these protective factors does NOT increase the risk of SIDS. Protective factors include: Room sharing (not to be confused with bed sharing, which is unsafe), pacifier use, and breastfeeding. Again, these factors are protective which is the equivalent of wearing your seatbelt. Wearing your seatbelt will not prevent a car crash but it can help in the event of a car crash.
All that being said, I often see parents neglecting the preventative factors when it comes to sleep *because* they are so exhausted from replacing the pacifier all night. For instance, I see parents falling asleep while holding their baby in the rocking chair because if they set them down they will lose their pacifier again and wake up. This is much more unsafe than removing the pacifier and working on independent sleep. Likewise, I see parents reach their limit playing the pacifier game so they end up pulling their baby into bed with them and finishing the night off there because it is easier. This is also unsafe.
With all of those factors mentioned, you can see why I still recommend weaning the pacifier sooner rather than later if it is causing you sleep issues.
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