As I type this post, my 3 and 5 year old are having their daily quiet time in their rooms. When I tell people that my boys have this time daily for about 2 hours, most parents are amazed and ask, “How can I get my child to stay in their room quietly for quiet time each day?!”

Not only is quiet time extremely beneficial for kids but it gives moms and dads a much needed mid day break as well. Honestly, I would have lost my sanity quite a while ago without daily quiet time. I’m not going to go into WHY quiet time is important in this post but feel free to do some extra reading if you’d like! 

So let’s talk about some of the specifics of this elusive quiet time.

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What is quiet time for toddlers and preschoolers?

Quiet time is simply a period of unstructured, calm time for your child. This usually takes place in your child’s room. And is an opportunity for their bodies and brains to rest and slow down once their afternoon nap has gone away. I recommend doing this everyday so that it’s never a fight and your child will grow to expect it.

When should I introduce quiet time for my child?

Ideally, your child would continue napping until at least 3 years of age and then once that nap was disappearing, you would start to introduce quiet time (more on how to do this below). I caution you not to introduce quiet time too early though. If you have a child under 3 who is struggling with naps, be sure to check out my blog on Toddler Sleep. 

Currently my 5 year old still has a daily quiet time and I intend for him to continue it until he starts kindergarten in the fall. Even once he’s in kindergarten, I plan to give him a shorter quiet time since he will be home by 2:40pm. I know he’ll need it even more after a full day of school and business. 

For more info on when your toddler may stop napping, check out this post by Snooze.net: When do toddlers stop napping?

How long should quiet time be?

I like to see quiet time lasting anywhere from 45 minutes to 2 hours. And I’ll be honest, a lot of days, I push my boys’ time to 3 hours (this is when I get most of my work done)! If quiet time is a brand new concept for your toddler or preschooler, I suggest starting small and working your way up. Start at first with about 15-20 minutes. Then you can gradually increase from there. 

Having a visual way for your child to see how much time is left can be really helpful, especially as they are getting used to this new habit. It will help them visually see how much time has passed and how much time is left. This particular one can be set up to 2 hours but they also make shorter (and cheaper) ones as well!

Another great option to visually show your child when their quiet time is up is the Mella Toddler Clock (save 10% with code: allthesleeps10). It has a built in nap timer that you can set for as little as 15 minutes and up to 3 hours! When the time is up, it turns green and your child knows that quiet time is over!

How should I introduce quiet time?

This is where it can get a little more complicated but I’m going to give you some tips and ideas depending on your current situation.

Situation 1:

Your child stopped napping a while ago and you are looking for a way to reintroduce that daily rest and quiet time. If this is you, I’d start small like I mentioned above. Start at 15 minutes a day and gradually increase it until quiet time is 45 minutes to 2 hours long. If you know it will be like pulling teeth to get your child to stay in their room without you, start by staying in the room with them. Take something for yourself to do (book, laptop, laundry, etc) and tell them that it’s quiet time. You don’t have to ignore them but avoid giving in and playing with them or and keep any interaction to a bare minimum.

Once they get more comfortable with that, then you can start excusing yourself to go use the bathroom, wash the dishes, or something else while they stay in their room. If they try to leave their room, be sure to enforce it rather than just letting it slide. That will help them to stop testing those boundaries around quiet time. 

Situation 2:

Your child naps some days but not reliably and you think that you probably aren’t far from naps ending.

If this is you, we still want to keep naps in place as long as your child needs them. But if you notice they are only napping about half the days of the week, you can start to give them quiet time days throughout the week.

Go through the days of the week with your child and let them pick which ones will be nap days and which ones will be quiet time days. If you know they have a busy morning on certain days, try to retain the nap on those afternoons. Save quiet time for your laid back days instead.

By letting your child go through with you and choose, we are giving them some control back and helping them to accept the naps on nap days. Obviously on nap days, we wouldn’t let them have any toys or supplies or in their rooms since we want them napping.

Situation 3:

Your child still naps everyday but you want to be as prepared as possible for when those naps start going away.

Yay! If your child is still napping, keep it up! Most 3 year olds still need a nap so you’re doing great. Even if your child runs into a temporary nap strike, keep pushing forward with nap time versus quiet time. Once you’ve had several weeks of nap refusals AND staying consistent, that’s when it’s a sign that you can start to gradually introduce quiet time. 

*Note: If your child was napping everyday previously and suddenly starts resisting every single nap, this is much more likely to be regression or testing related rather than a sign that they don’t need a nap. This is when it’s important to remain consistent around your routines and avoid over-helping to sleep at nap time.

More tips and tricks:

1. Have a quiet time box. Fill it with simple activities that your child can do without your help. If they will need your help to do puzzles, avoid putting those kinds of items in there. This could be things like Legos, blocks, coloring, race cars, books, dolls, stickers etc. 
2. I suggest having a box because it’s easy to transport in and out of their room. This box should be removed for bedtime and if you are keeping naps on some day then the box should be removed those days as well.
3. Keep this box special just for quiet time. Try to avoid letting your child play with these specific items outside of quiet time. This keeps the box of goodies more special and can act as a motivator to look forward to.
4. Be sure that you only provide items to play with that you trust your child with. I allow itty bitty Lego pieces with my boys but that’s because I know they will not be putting them in their mouths. I don’t yet allow my 3 year old to have markers because I’m not entirely sure he won’t draw on the walls! Keep it age-appropriate. 🙂   

Personally speaking, I cannot express to you guys how much having a daily quiet time has benefited my boys. My oldest spends the entire time making lego creations, playing pretend in his room, and drawing masterpieces. It is truly a joy to watch the ways he has learned to entertain and grow his mind without my help at all! 

My younger son is still newer to quiet time so he’s still figuring things out but he has also grown into playing pretend on his with his race cars and singing lots of songs during his time. 

Lastly, it has made such a difference for ME as well! Being a mom of 2 boys while working from home is no easy feat but this daily quiet time gives me the chance to sit down and catch my breath.